Vox Polis

Berlusconi has at last conceded defeat, ending weeks of uncertainty. But what can we expect from Prodi’s government assuming the fragile coalition remains intact?

looking at the problems he’s facing at home and the wafer thin political majority he has, I think Prodi will follow in Merkel’s footsteps and concentrate on foreign affairs. First off as an opponent to the war in Iraq we can expect the remaining troops to be recalled within the year. As a former EU President we can expect the future of the European project to be high on his agenda, especially the return of the EU Constitution.

At home one of the first things Prodi will need to do is tackle the fragile economy - but i’m not convinced he’ll be able to achieve much. Not only will he need to negotiate with the Communists, but few will have the stomach for the reforms that would be needed to revigorate the economy.

Berlusconi simply won’t admit he’s lost. He’s the person who at a children’s party always has to win the games. In musical chairs, he’s the one who’s chair never gets taken. Well this time Berlusconi it has been taken and by the quickest kid - Prodi. Granted Prodi may not last long- the IHT reported today that fractions are already appearing, as Clemente Mastella opted out from joing Prodi in government- but he won fair and square!

Berlusconi has even declared that he’s going to turn up to work as normal on Friday. This is like turning up to someone elses birthday and telling everyone it’s actually your birthday and taking all the presents. For the sake of Italy accept the result, Berlusconi!!

…well he still could. It seems that Berlusconi wasn’t satisfied with the results that saw Prodi win the lower house by 0.1% of the vote (a margin of 25,000 votes) and only just gained the Senate. Silvio is know pushing for a recount.

The grouping that wins automatically gets 55% of the seats - a new reform that is supposed to create more stability in Italian politics….i find it quite amuzing that they got rid of the first past the post system for this election and reintroduced PR. PR’s not known for its creation of stability.
This fiasco is like Florida in 2000 all over again…but without the hanging chads.

It seems that the final televised fist fight between Prodi and Berlusconi was once again worth missing Eastenders for…it was full of excitement as genial Berlusconi decided to announce a new policy in his closing remarks (which i’m sure he will keep if elected) to get rid of council tax, meaning old cool and aloof Prodi couldn’t reply. What a great move.

Prodi also said that Berlusconi was “a drunkard clinging to a lamp-post, not for illumination, but to keep him standing up.”

Happy with his performance Berlusconi decided to bounce back and call all those Italian’s who plan to vote for Prodi “Dickheads” (the Italian word is “coglioni” which means testicles). Maybe the Italian’s like being insulted!

I’ll have to remember this trick when i’m caught with my trousers down. It seems that sex deprived Berlusconi has been conducting his own poll this week- that of call girls.

You can imagine the conversation can’t you:

Mrs Berlusconi: Silvio, Silvio! Why is the phone bill so high?

Silvio Berlusconi: I…I’ve.. i’ve been conducting a poll. yes that’s right a poll…of.. call girls, and they all think i’m great! Therefore i’m going to win the elections. They especially loved my policy on the black economy.

Well at least someone likes him.

It looks like Berlusconi really is Jesus- he’s performed his first miracle. will he be able to perform another at next week’s election?

Surprisingly there’s a number of reports this week that Berlusconi has been getting more TV covereage than his rivals- how does he do it??!!! Its like he owns them or something! Oh wait he does!

On Friday Berlusconi returned to his fall back poisition of blaming all Italy’s woes on the Euro, which of course was introduced by Prodi. At a meeting of the European People’s Party (the biggest right wing party in the European Parliament) he said:

“In periods of economic stagnation, the opposition always wins. There is only one exception, Tony Blair, because of his personal charisma, and because he still has the Pound sterling. Here, there has been an unprecedented increase in prices since the introduction of the euro.”

You’ve got to love Berlusconi’s new tactics. The election plan of rubbing shoulders with the great and the (not so) good wasn’t winning the election, so clearly a new tactic was needed: try and offend as many people as you can before the vote. Last week he attacked the business community, this week he’s taken on China.

At the weekend he said that the Chinese Communists “didn’t eat babies but boiled them to fertilise the fields.”

Berlusconi’s also done wonders for Italy’s tourist industry.

The US decided to warn their citizens that there could be violence and terrorism in Italy in the run up to election. Any other leader would have condemned that accusation, saying that Italy was a peaceful nation, that terrorism will not be a threat. Not Berlusconi. He decided to say “if I were an American, I, too, would be worried.” Well Berlusconi you should be worried- it looks likely you may be out of office very soon!

Bad hair transplant Berlusconi is up to his old tricks again. Last weekend he decided to slightly annoy the business community by declaring that the Confindustria all supported the Centre Left coalition. Now i’ve met a few business leaders in the past and they’re generally a little bit right wing (some are closet lefties im sure). So you can imagine this made them slightly angry. In fact it made them so angry that a few have started contemplating voting for Prodi….Berlusconi really knows how to run an election campaign!!

A couple of those business men have now come out to say that Berlusconi is close to having a nervous break down!!

It must be tough being Berlusconi. You wake up in one of your villas in the morning and watch your very own TV station proclaiming how great you are. Then you hold andiences with the Pope or George Bush, or perhaps the Blairs might pop in for a holiday. Only a few weeks to go now Mr Berlusconi…how much more outrageous can this man go?!

Old Berlusconi is having a busy couple of days. Yesterday he swore on the “life of his children” that he knew nothing about the recent Mills bribe story. Honestly he really doesn’t think much of his kids does he.

Then he didn’t like some of the questions he was getting from a chat show journalist and stormed off….shame he didn’t own that one!

And now tonight Berlusconi and Prodi have thier TV debate…Berlusconi has denounced it as “a waxworks show” because of all the rules the Prodi camp have forced him to agree to. Ok, I agree that these rules can become a bit petty (what colour shirts and ties everyone has to wear etc etc)…but let’s not forget what Dear Berlusconi wanted to do at the end of the debate….As current leader he wanted to finish the debate with a televised press conference given by him alone!

…..along comes somebody ripe for manipulation. Berlusconi is going to meet the pope days before the election. He’s planning to turn it into a “papal blessing.” I suppose to the “Jesus Christ of politics” its only second nature to contact your father through his Voice on Earth.

The question is, is there anyone else that Berlusconi can rub shoulders with to help him win this election?